I am now 10 days away from an event that is certain to completely change my life. I have decided to move ahead with eye muscle surgery. I have scheduled the surgery on May 24th at Northwest Eye Surgeons in Seattle, Washington. Dr. Werner Cadera will be performing the surgery -- he specializes in adults with Strabismus and does about 300 of this type of surgery each year.
When Dr. Cadera examined me, he found that my right eye is about 20-25 diopters misaligned. The prisms I have in my glasses only correct my misalignment by 9 diopters. What this means is that even with the strongest prism (about 16 diopters is the maximum one can have in eye glasses), my eyes will still be misaligned and there would be little hope I would ever be able to use both of my eyes together. With this level of misalignment, I will not be able to ever get the separate images I see out of each eye to fuse together to create one image. Therefore, without surgery, I would see double until my brain decided to repress the vision in my right eye and return to using my left eye only. In fact, there is a chance that my brain would never turn off the vision in my right eye and I would see double for the rest of my life.
Dr. Cadera explained that I will be awake during the surgery. I will be given a sedative to relax me and they will numb my eye with numbing drops. He will then make an incision in the thin white lining that covers the eye (called the sclera), peeling it back to expose the muscles that lie directly beneath. He will then surgically remove and reattach the muscles, shortening and lengthening the ones that are improperly placed. The sclera is then reattached and the surgery is complete. My eye will be red and irritated for about a week -- taking a full month to recover and settle into place. The thought of being awake, potentially being able to see a scalpel and sutchers come in and out of my sight is quite unnerving. I need to muster all of the courage I have to venture into this frightening reality.
But therein lies the hope of a much brighter existence for me. Dr. Cadera told me that with surgery, there is an 80% he can surgically move two of the six muscles in my right eye and achieve 100% alignment with my left eye. If my eyes were not 100% aligned after surgery, he said I could wait 3 months and have a second "touch-up" procedure. After the second surgery he could almost guarantee that I would have 100% alignment with my left eye. With that being said, how could I not decide that surgery would be the best option for me?
So I am moving ahead. Forging into, what is for me, uncharted, scary, dark waters. As I set sail into the unknown, I am propelled forward by a glimmer of a beautiful light in the distance. The light of hope. Once my eyes are aligned I should be able to continue with my vision therapy and learn to use my eyes together. Once I learn to use them together, there is a good chance I should be able to fuse the vision in both of my eyes together. If this happens, I should be able to obtain, for the first time in my life, some degree of binocular 3D vision.
What still makes these waters so dark and scary to me is the thought that I will wake up from surgery with worse vision than I have now. Will the dark black holes I see in my right eye fuse with the nearly perfect vision I have in my left creating a darkened view of the world? Or will my brain be plastic enough to take the best vision out of both eyes and create a picture that is much improved compared to the vision I have now? My both of my eye doctors tend to believe the second scenario is true. They both believe that I will have better vision than I do now.
But I have set my course and am sailing toward the light that glimmers on the horizon, trusting fully in my God, my Creator, and my Source for all real hope. He provides me with the courage, wisdom and strength to continue my journey towards a brighter future.
Michelle, my prayers will be with you. I am glad that you are making this move and you found a doctor who specializes in this. Of, you know this, but place it all in God's hands... when we worry it means we are not trusting his plan for us...
ReplyDeleteKarey
My prayers are with you and I know you'll do well and be fine. I can relate a little after pondering, researching and debating in my mind for over 10 years whether or not to have lasik surgery. Like you, I finally decided to move forward and after 7 months out of contact lenses my lasik surgery was performed 12/3/10 and I have no regrets. Even though you're awake and aware, the doctor and his team will make certain you're relaxed and treat you with the utmost care. Like you, I was concerned but I stood on Philippians 4:13 as I have for many years and our loving Father came through, as He always has. Miss you but enjoy your posts. They're fun to read but also very encouraging.
ReplyDeleteGod bless
Jim
I am inspired by your journey. Keep the faith! I will add my prayers for your your successful surgery. I too have strabismus, but my weak eye is able to be corrected to 20/30 so the eye doctors have never considered that I had much of a problem. As I have gotten older (48), however, the crossing has become more pronounced and I also began to need reading glasses. Last September I embarked on my own journey toward binocular vision, but without the benefit of a therapist. I may employ one when my financial situation allows, but for now I am doing the therapy on myself, with my optometrist under-prescribing my contact lenses.I recognize it's probably not the most effective path, but I have gotten rid of my reading glasses and the astigmatism in my right (good) eye:) I believe our brains can learn how to use both eyes together and that will be the outcome for you as well! Keep posting!
ReplyDeleteThank you all for your encouragement and prayers. I am getting increasingly more excited for the "big day" each and every day that passes.
ReplyDeleteDenise, I am glad you found my blog. I will continue to post as I venture though this process. I am glad you are coming along for the ride!